We've all heard the saying "patience is a virtue", unfortunately it is a virtue that few of us have very much of. Even after years of hearing the military motto "hurry up and wait" I, like most American's, still find myself irritated by the smallest wait time. Haven't you ever caught yourself bouncing your feet as you are forced to wait at the doctors office? Or secretly been irritated at that person in front of you in line, who has a million ridiculous questions and concerns? Having been the person behind the desk/counter I'd like to think that I can appreciate that everyone is doing their best and they will get to me as quickly as possible, but this past year has really been a lesson in patience for me.
In my life it's the decision that is the difficult part. Once a decision has been made I put all of my focus into making it happen, and making it happen as quickly as possible, especially when that decision will bring about a wonderful change. So, when my Swedish boyfriend (pojkvän) and I began talking about wanting to live together, and subsequently deciding who would move where, the waiting began. Naturally I did what I do best, research. Research on necessary paperwork, schools for my 5 year old daughter, Swedish language classes, life in Stockholm, and even the Stockholm subway system (which my boyfriend, Joel, found very amusing). If I was going to uproot my life and move halfway around the world with my daughter I was going to have every scrap of information possible! After many discussions and lots of sleepless nights we finally made the big decision...Cierra and I would be moving.
Whew! Decision made, hard part over!.................WRONG. Originally the Swedish Resident Permit application process was said to take about 6-8 months, a long time to be apart, but doable. Then the Migration Board (Migrationsverket) updated their website and the wait time was changed to 7-10 months. A very depressing wait time for a couple madly in love, and for my 5 year old who is crazy about Joel. Sometimes all the skyping in the world just isn't enough, but we would have to make do. In early November I noticed another update on the migration board's website indicating that they were changing part of their system and we were eligible to apply online starting in December. The new online system would drastically shorten the waiting time, they were promising a decision within 3 months. This was wonderful news!!! We finally applied on January 11th during Joel's vacation with us in the U.S. There was a few hours of elation, we had finally applied, no turning back, but then the real waiting began. Joel was wonderful of course, he knows how much I dislike waiting, and on top of that, how much I dislike not knowing where things are in the process. He was always encouraging, and even sympathized with my obsessive worrying when we didn't receive an invitation to schedule and interview right away. The days dragged by, I hated not knowing. Finally, on February 2nd (my birthday no less) I received the much awaited email. I called the office of the Swedish Consulate in San Francisco (the closest one to me on their list), and was told to wait again :( They were working out some kinks in their system and would call me back when they received the application info from Sweden. On February 9th I called them back, determined to either get an appointment for an interview, or to be forwarded to someone else who could help me. I was directed to their Seattle office and got an appointment for the 14th (great Valentine's day present). The interview was short, but went well. It was wonderful to know that we have nothing left to do on our end. The rest is up to the migration board in Sweden. But now we are back in waiting mode again. The representative at the interview said we could expect a decision in the next 1-3 months.
Secretly, I'm that girl who checks the Migrationsverket website twice a day hoping that a decision will have been made. We've made the life changing decision to move to Stockholm, and now I want to start living that life. I hate waiting. Joel, in his utterly charming way, reminds me almost every day that I am "learning patience" and that we will be together soon. So, for now, I have the promise of a wonderful future in a new and amazing country that I can hardly wait to call my own.
